The Transience of Existence

I did it. Again. I moved. It would sure be nice if I stayed in one place for longer than 6 months, but apparently that is too much to ask of life…or of my contentment. Without fail I always end up relocating somewhere because I get bored. And I know I'll only be at my current residence for six months before London. Wow. I should have my head examined. Anywho, I've been basking in the somewhat carefree vacation, aside from the moving stress of course, and realized that I am getting burned out on school again as well. Not a good sign. At this rate I won't graduate until I'm 30…and that's a problem. I do not want to be hanging around Provo for that long.

On a completely unrelated topic, I've been pondering on the blogging world again lately. Wondering about how incredibly fascinating it is to find people's blogs and see their personality come alive through words. Have you ever met anyone and thought "Well they're nice, but kind of dull" and never really gotten to know them beyond that? But then you discover their blog and hey, it's public domain, so why not read a little? All of the sudden they have a life and a personality. Quirks and things you never even imagined beneath that steely exterior. How do people do that? How do we have so many freaking facets of our personality that you can spend an extended period of time with someone and still never really know who they are? Then I get to wondering how much of my own personality doesn't come across to people when I meet them. Clearly I have too much free time to ponder on things without school.

Why do you have to JUDGE me?!

Yes it is indeed 2 freaking AM in the morning and instead of finishing my paper like a good girl, I'm going to blog. But my brain needs a little variety. So here's my anecdote for the day...

Today I was tired. Of course not nearly as tired as I'm going to be tomorrow, but tired all the same. It was probably in anticipation of how little sleep I'll be getting in the next 3 days. Wow, I ramble when it's late. Anywho, today, because I was tired, I decided to spice up my life by wearing my most comfy sweater. My most comfy sweater happens to be dark navy blue with a very large word printed across the front. Now you would think that my sweater said NAZI, COMMUNIST, or U of U FAN with all of the strange and sometimes dirty looks I receieved. Even people who are supposedly my friends gave me funny looks without actually addressing me about it. Curious yet? Well, it happens to be a sweater I purchased on my last vacation to Washington, where my bestie and I visited a little po-dunk town named FORKS! Yes people, I wore a sweater with FORKS stamped across the front, and was judged. Now I know not everyone in the world is a die-hard Twilight Fan (i'm really not a huge fan myself, but i like souvenirs), but do you really have to act that appalled over a fictional book? I mean seriously, I don't judge people when they wear Obama or Transformer shirts, so why you gotta be hatin? Honestly, I'm really not that offended if you judge me. I'm used to it, I expect it, my life would be dull without it. But I just find it funny that while you stood there judging me, I was secretly laughing on the inside.

The Surreal Life

Today I attended the last day of class I will ever have to go to...in the year 2009 at least. Still have plenty more ahead. Luckily. Haha. The last few weeks have been a little strange and I can't quite pin down what's been going on. I've been walking around with the feeling that I'm watching my life from a tv screen. Do you ever feel like that? Like you're having a really long dream and you're watching the motions of life go forward like normal, but you're not in it. All of the sudden the end of the semester came, the snow came, the change came. So I'm just waiting to wake up and realize that the last 4 months weren't real and I've still got to get through fall. Weird.

Anywho, going along with the theme of surreality (is that even a word, because if it isn't it probably should be), I've got another bombshell in my life. Ever since I was little, I have dreamed of going to England. But I've been telling myself since I got back from Jerusalem that it just wasn't feasible. That I shouldn't take out another loan, that I got my chance to live abroad, and I've got a lot of other options to pursue here. However, a few weeks ago right before Thanksgiving, I decided to bite the bullet and apply to the study abroad program anyway. I figured the odds of my being accepted were slim considering my circumstances. But then I had my interview with the directors on Tuesday and they were ready to adopt me they liked me so much. So I got my email of acceptance today, and now I'M GOING TO ENGLAND NEXT SUMMER!!!!! I haven't even told my parents yet, so shhhhh! Probably because I know they'll tell me I shouldn't. It's kind of insane, but I am incredibly excited for the opportunity to fulfill a lifelong dream....and of course still waiting to wake up. But at this point, I sincerely hope I don't.

Ode to Lost and Found

So I had an inspiring experience yesterday that I decided to share amongst the stress of finals and trying to move. Yesterday before class I went to the library to print off a paper and notes on my presentation for the next class. I was horrified to find that when I searched my backpack, my jump drive was no longer in it. I racked my brain trying to think of the last time I used it, and worried because I almost never took it out of my backpack. So I went to class unprepared and begged for mercy. Literally ran home (which is a feat in itself considering the snow conditions as of late) to turn my room upside down, and still couldn't find it. Went back to the library and checked with the security guards as well as the lab attendant in the place I'd last seen it. Proceeded to the Wilk where the Lost and Found finally reunited me with my DRAMALAMA (Stefanie named it of course, as if I'm dramatic psh) jump drive. My faith in humanity has been restored! Never have I been more grateful for the honesty of the BYU student body than I was yesterday. So even though I might fail all my classes this semester and find myself homeless for an extended period of time, at least I'll have my faith in humanity...and my jump drive of course.